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July 5, 2011

Wedding Crazies

With 18 days left to go before the nups, I have now entered what is clinically known as the Psycho Stage, wherein I imagine all the terrible things that could go wrong and am kept awake at night, haunted by visions of anthropomorphized favor boxes that try to strangle me with their little green bows.

Did I mention I got a new flower girl-- my fourth-- on Saturday? It's a funny story; you should ask me about it once Psycho Stage has transitioned into Things-Are-Going-to-Go-Wrong-But-I-Don't-Care* stage, which I'm told I'll ease into like a warm bath a day or two before the ceremony.

For now you can expect me to randomly burst into tears, eat my feelings in the form of lemon curd, and get irrationally angry when I discover that the guy who updated my bank account at Wells Fargo neglected to tell me that I now have a new PIN number, which means I can't access muh money to get bus fare to go down and see the dude. Or maybe it is rational to get angry at him...

You can also expect that if I have one more person rescind their acceptance or decide last-minute that they want to come, thereby ruining my currently-so-perfect-I-want-to-frame-it-and-in-fact-might* seating chart, I. Will. Club. A. Baby. Seal. (Speaking of, here's a funny joke: A baby seal walks into a club.)

*I am sure there are compound German words that convey these thoughts much more succinctly. Such as Dierelaxenphasen and RSVPzeitneinzatharden.


  1. Lady, you're so close. I want nothing more than for bridal apathy to strike you and to strike you soon. It will peaceful.

  2. You really were not kidding about this. The 18-day mark is here and I feel like I'm slowly going insane...can't wait for that apathy to set in!