Nupdate

The other day I was at a gathering of old college buddies, some of whom I hadn't seen in four years. As each new person arrived, we went around the table and did the requisite, "My Current Life In Two Sentences or Less" speech. After a couple brewskis and some very potent communal drinks, I summed my life up thusly:

I glue paper to other pieces of paper and cut them into circles.

Man, my life is cool.

Let's review my goals for last week and see where I ended up:

• Getting our marriage license: Check! We went to Scott County last week and signed our lives away. We'll be able to pick up the license tomorrow after the mandatory five-day waiting period.
• Figuring out if a state shutdown would mean we couldn't do a courthouse marriage to make it legit: Oh boy, was this ever a doozy. Long story short, I never did get a straight answer, but that's OK because my Truth Pirate Anna called me up after reading that post and was all, "Dude. My beef can do it." Tom, holy of holies from the Internet-certified Church of Tom, has already nupped some of his friends and could slap his signature on our marriage certificate immediately following the ceremony. Now we don't have to have two anniversaries! Everybody dance! Check! (PS: find the hilarry musings of both Anna and Tom at www.frecklemeat.com.)
• Forcing the Dude to get measured for his tux: Check! Only one groomsman and his fazhah and my P'pa left to get measured (hint, hint, Daddy dear).
• Meet with the photographer: Check! I have her on the hunt for a castle in the south metro where we can take the bridal party shots. I need it to have a moat, seven butlers and tapestries depicting handsome chevaliers. I WILL ACCEPT NOTHING LESS.
• Make a unity candle: Well, I didn't end up making one, but FMIL gifted us with a beautiful engraved number. Check!
• Find a glass for us to break: Fail. Does anyone have a chipped wine glass they want to donate to the cause?
• Make a hairpiece: Fail. I went to a yarn store and got some lovely fuchsia fiber I was going to attempt to knit into a flower. Then Ma got some crafty rosettes, pearls and a feather. We'll see if they turn into anything, but I'm still waiting for inspiration to strike. 
• Figure out our guestbook situation: Check! I ordered a delightfully cheesy visual history of our relationship via Snapfish.

Not on the checklist but of note: I had some lovely brideslaves (or "wedding fairies" as they preferred to be called) over last Wednesday for a Favor Box Assembly Line. I did the box assembly, Manders did the tag punching, Anna did the ribbon cutting, Lo did the tag ribboning, and then we all pitched in on the godforsaken ribbon bow tying. We knocked out 123 of those suckers in one single night. Industriousness brought to you by wine, grilled cheese, and delicious ice cream treats.

My ma and I also visited our friends at Security Jewelers in Duluth to peruse wedding bands and we chose matting for our super-hot ketubah. 

This week's plans include, er, gluing paper to other paper and then cutting it into circles for escort cards, wrangling our last RSVPs (don't even get me started... a topic for another post), having a dress fitting, preparing for my aufruf this Saturday in Duluth (you should come!) and finishing the last of those rapscallion favor boxes.

It shall be done. Mark my words... it shall be done.

Even more crafting

Programming announcement: I had a little blogging hiatus earlier this month because I had nothing to talk about but my wedding, and I didn't want to be one of those annoying people who only talked about their wedding. But who knows? Maybe you like France AND nups. And if you don't, just ignore me for the next 40-some days.

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I've been heading down the the future-in-laws' about once a week for marathon GED (Git 'Er Done) sessions with the FMIL. Friday was our most epic one yet, and we did everything from getting a photo of the Dude's grandparents' wedding enlarged for display, to buying floofy hairpieces for the flower girls, to investigating gifts for the bridal party. 

Oh, and we tested some of the graham cracker toffee we're giving away as favors. I'm storing several portions of it in my freezer, and it's my duty as an American to test them every few days to ensure they still taste fresh and delicious. I'm really good at that part of wedding planning.

One of our GED tasks was to get paper for the escort cards.  This blog had an awesome idea: get paint chips in the wedding colors for the low low price of FREE. I convinced the FMIL to go to an unsuspecting Home Depot and help me pilfer approximately 160 paint chips in the above colors. Don't worry; next time will hit up another store to get our remaining 90 so we spread the love around. FYI: "shoplifting" free paint chips is a really good way to bond with your future mother in law.

We decided to make the favor boxes as complicated as possible. I wrote a little poem so people get the fact that they're getting graham crackers from the Grahams (hyuk!), and we printed them out on cardstock. We like pain, so we decided circles would be cuter than squares and spent a million years trying to manipulate the text to fit perfectly. Then comes the worst part: tying a tiny, slippery ribbon into a tiny adorable bow.

If you want to come over and help me do this I'll let you test some graham cracker toffee.

Lastly, it was time to finish my brooch bouquet. I just want to point out that I had the idea for mine before Miranda Lambert was even BORN. She totally copied me. Totally. 

The stems of the rest of my maids' bouquets are wrapped in ivory fabric and brocade trim, so we did mine in gold ribbon with pearl trim. FMIL coated the ribbon in fabric adhesive and then carefully wrapped that sucker up.Ain't she a beaut? 

Other tasks I accomplished this week include: writing a first draft of our charmingly complicated interfaith ceremony, writing a first draft of my vows, getting slimming undergarments for the dress so I don't have to worry about working out, getting a makeup consult (see my FB pic for results), and doing my first dress fitting. I had thought that my shoes would be tall enough that I would be able to avoid getting it hemmed, but I was dead wrong. Goodbye $50.

Goals for next week include: getting our marriage license, figuring out if a state shutdown would mean we couldn't do a courthouse marriage to make it legit, forcing the Dude to get measured for his tux if I have to move heaven and earth to make it happen, meet with the photographer, make a unity candle, find a glass for us to break, make a hairpiece and figure out our guestbook situation. Totally doable thanks to a little gift I call gainful unemployment.

Craft Night

During my search for accessories for my Flower Children and Defender of the Rings I've been plagued by the same nagging thought I often have as I wander through artisan craft fairs and fancy bakeries (no matter how far from the truth it is): "Pshh... I could MAKE that."

Since I actually have made a pillow before-- seventh grade home ec, whut whut-- I thought this time I could put my crafting where my mouth was. My buddy Kristin has her very own sewing machine and was kind enough to let me experiment on it. I went to Jo Ann Fabrics and got a yard of ivory satin fabric, two yards of lace trim, a roll of ivory ribbon, a cool pearl button and some cotton batting.

Now that I'm an expert, I will teach you how to make a Slightly Wonky Defender of the Rings Pillow:


Step 1: Make a Pattern

I used a ruler to cut an 8-inch square from a piece of notebook paper. Then I doubled my fabric and cut around it. As you can see, I wasn't as precise as I could have been, and that led to some problems later. I've never been good at straight lines...

Step 2: Attach Lace Trim

I wanted the lace to poke out the sides of the pillow, so Kristin helped me figure out he best way to pin it. We decided to sew the lace to one piece of the satin, and then put the other piece on top and sew it all together.

Step  3: Don't Swallow the Pins in Your Mouth

Satin is a tricksy little fabric for a novice to work with. It didn't help that I'd done a poor job cutting it out-- my seam was anything but even. At one point the needle lost the thread and I decided to be a big girl and re-thread it myself-- incorrectly, as it turns out. The machine started making terrible noises and threatening to kill us all. Thank G Kristin was there to troubleshoot and soothe Madame Bernina.


Step 4: Stuff It with Stuff

We made sure to leave a 3-inch gap in one of the seams to allow for stuffing. I packed in tuft after tuft of batting, and still only used a fraction of the $2.99 bag I bought. It was looking kind of lumpy so I punched it a few times until it obeyed.

Step 5: Finish and Make Pretty-Like

I took the pillow home with me to hand sew that last little seam we'd used for stuffing. Then I threaded a few feet of ribbon through the pearl button, and using a small button on the back of the pillow to anchor it, I sewed that baby on.

Voilà! My very own handmade Slightly Wonky Defender of the Rings Pillow!